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The Colbert Report/Episodes/EpGuide/Episode 484
Production Info Intro SEGMENT1 * spirit of Thanksgiving ** soundtrack the #1 album on iTunes * He'd like to thank, but cannot ** it is #16 despite reviews * There's something new in every viewing * sunglasses display mannequin, Kanye West * Stephen will use "courier" when his name is etched into the moon * West is not the voice of a generation or a decade * Stephen is, followed by ** Obama girl ** free credit report band ** crocs & Kanye tied * Operation Humble Kanye Dec 3rd 5pm EST ** buy Dr. Colbert's album SEGMENT2 * Obama announced his National Security team ** they don't know anything about Nat'l Sec *** only one wore a fake mustache * Obama is calling for more troops in Afghanistan ** third most troubled "stan" * has never been conquered since Alexander the Great (Stephen says 1947) * playing polo with a headless goat carcass * Hamid Karzai's iron fist also wears a funny hat * make heroin uncool ** get Al Roker hooked on smack *** gastric bypass in a syringe * Khaled Hosseini * book: "A Thousand Splendid Suns" ** real life Afghani person * 1,000 splendid suns is greedy * encourages patient ** Americans don't do patience ** no drive thru window * gave Axel Rose 17 years * Afghanistan ** Sunny Town ** Lafghanistan * his schtick is to not wear ties to interviews ** unlike many of his countrymen SEGMENT3 *better watch out, better not cry, * Tip Of The Hat, Wag Of The Finger ** All-war Christmas Edition *** not all, but all he's pulling out * wag-- National Toy Hall of Fame ** inducted the "the stick" ** all natural, the perfect price * free is not the perfect price * Stephen is so angry, he wants to poke him in the eye, not with a stick, but a replica light saber * Otter Nonsense * wag-- Barbie ** eco-line of Barbie green accessories * conservation goes against everything Barbie stands for if she could stand * wag-- Order of St. Nick Greeting Cards ** created cards for atheists * evolution line ending in Santa Claus * Darwin in Santa outfit * you cannot take the "Christ" out of "Christmas" ** like taking Christ out of Crystal Light Interview * Roland Fryer * economist studying to find out if cash incentives improve student's grades, which means we can look forward to seeing Secretary of Education, Alex Trebek * studies facts and statistics * studies all universes * blacks are the worst performing students in America's school systems ** Stephen is not the first person to call him a racist * achievement gap is biggest civil rights concern * he watches a lot of TV, but not The Colbert Report * the interview ended * looking at Chicago ** an "A" can get $50/class every 5 weeks ** this turned Stephen black * he offered Dr. Colbert some money if he asks good questions * second year in NY ** first year in Chicago and D.C. * as a professor nothing more than theory can be expected * Professor Fryer did not award Dr. Colbert for his brilliant questions, but Stephen was able to use the who's fastest market to determine that he had indeed earned it Epilogue * Dr. Colbert flicks a WristStrong Bracelet into the crowd as he wishes America a good night Gallery Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Image: Motherload Videos External Tubes *Link Title *Link Title Reviews and Comments